A new story, Inside thoughts of a porn star

[oregongaper]

Is this worth posting? It's incomplete, a bit disjointed. It's lifted out of a draft. There is more before this, some parts extracted out of the body of this text, and then it ends right when it's getting good, and left me wanting more.

The rambling remembrances of a ridiculously randy redhead, rolling a reefer while riding a righteous rump reamer.

I’m watching Hole on tape. Studying game tapes like the football team does on Mondays, because even though I get off watching my own porn, in my head it’s totally different than watching someone else fuck. But I always watch for when I get dropped on some guy’s lap with his cock up my ass.

I know I’m really not, but during a scene, my mind allows the illusion to exist that I have control of myself. All the way until my feet get forced up off the thighs of my anchor man. It doesn’t matter how long that criminally thick cock has been slamming up into my ever-loosening asshole, but whenever I get pushed back on his chest and my legs are forced up in the air, the knowing I’m about lose all positional control of my body, fully impaled and opened to the man/men waiting to join us. Even after three years of acting (excuse my laughing, an actress…hooo. Funny.) in this business it’s that moment in a scene where I let my inner freak out. And it’s been months, maybe longer since I’ve done a scene that doesn’t have that particular movement in it. I’m a full on double anal slut, and I love it.

In itself, the drop isn’t any big deal for me, unlike some of the fresher girls that are clearly scared to lose that foot hold that is her last chance to escape. Believe me, because I watch what they do when I am bingeing on porn, just like I am this morning. When I am being critical of a scene I’m watching faces as much as I can. Watch the slaps and bumps they’re using as cues instead of talking, seeing how much effort they put into editing, and all kinds of things.

I know I’m different. It has to be mental. Getting dropped on a cock is just one little example, and it’s a part of how I’m feeling this morning…I think my cat knows when I’m going to get freaky before I do, because she disappears. Sure, I fuck myself everyday, but days like this are different. I talk to myself more, and while I rarely formally address myself, my freak name has always been Hole. It’s Monday morning and the these feelings are gently lapping on my skin, little flashes of goosebumps even. These feelings, fuck. This happens about twice a month and I can tell now that I’ll go until late tomorrow night, probably crash out Wednesday day.

I certainly can’t speak for anyone else, but when I get really cranked up I go into an altered state. Am I a nymphomaniac? Don’t know if I believe that that even exists, while at the same time knowing that I can become so consumed with stuffing huge objects in my ass that I’ll do it and not even maintain normal activities. Like eating, sleeping, or personal hygiene. So maybe I am a nympho, or is it Hole who’s the nympho? I’ve made space for here in my life, so I’m OK with where I’m at.

But on these mornings, when I’m just starting to feel horny, I think about how these sensations affect me and compare various parts of what makes up this insane (Yea, I said that) sex drive I have.

I haven’t named it yet, but this hyper-horny experience I go on, from the very beginning I can distinguish it from my normal state of constant arousal.

When I doing a scene it comes to me at the drop. It’s almost like the first twinges you feel on an acid trip, a tingle up my spine and I want to giggle. It’s subtle, but I’ve seen myself visibly shiver right then in three or four times when studying my own work. Those tend to be scenes where I had two or more cocks over 9” and I was super horny going in. In 99% of porn scenes that have the drop, the girl being dropped will soon have a cock in her pussy, but not me. Once my legs go up that second cock always goes in my ass. Always.

One time I was dropped on this super thick Brazilian Donkey dick and I flashed to Star Wars and cracked up laughing visualizing making the jump to light speed in the Millennium Falcon. The instant slamming of another 10” monster next to it up my ass appeared to knock the wind out of me, because I went silent, but I went back to laughing about four deep strokes later. That was a great scene for me and really a fan favorite, too.

Once I have been dropped on a cock the action definitely takes a turn. In my earlier DAP’s it took a few minutes, or maybe until the #3 man tagged in before I could settle enough to look good with two cocks fucking my ass.

It’s very important to me that the audience knows that I am enjoying the sex taking place. That’s because I truly love being a complete anal slut. It’s why I came into porn in the first place.

Even in high school I knew I would end up in LA. I got into stuffing my ass and pussy with cucumbers in the 8^th grade. Once I stretched my holes enough to feel it the next day, I had a feeling that I might be different. Girls at school would lament the possibility that they might actually risk feeling something in their crotch. Shit, that next day ache was great, I’d be so sensitive that I could rub my panties a bit and cum in a way that didn’t hurt, but I still had a lot of heat in my cunt (or ass) and made if more intense.

It wasn't long before skinny little five foot nothing, buck oh five weighing me was stopping at Safeway on the walk home from school to get three fresh cucumbers twice a week, and I got a kick out of how the checkout ladies (that’s how I thought of them back then, ladies, because they were soooo much older, ya know, like in their 30’s maybe) were not a bit shy about complimenting me on the quality of the choices I’d made. I bought three because I would get two that I knew would fit comfortably and then a third, bigger one I dubbed the Challenger. That way I could get my fuck on nice and hard and also work on getting bigger for part of my playtime. Sandi was one of the checkers I saw a lot and she steadily got more sexual in her comments to me. I think it was because I always blushed and never denied any of what she alluded to. This interplay went on from 8^th grade until I graduated high school-there’s some stories there ohh, yes…Sandi was so sexy…

Wait, OMG, I just added the title to this. I’m fucking stoned alright, shit. Who doesn’t love some horny alliteration? Ok, slow it back down, hole.

Fuck, I wish this didn’t feel so good…I’m such a liar

Christ, I gotta stay away from that amyl I brought, no, smuggled it from Europe in my ass, the amyl nitrite. I need to keep out of that as long as I possibly can. Fuck, just thinking of about it is pushing me over… slow down, Hole, pace yourself.

The thought that I sat on a plane for 13 hours with 600 ml of that nasty, horny, stinky, ass opening, nose burning crap stuffed in my ass is so hot.. Fuckfuckfuck I’m cumming again.

Stream of thought, mmmmmmmmmmmm, damn. I’ve really got a thing for butt plugs. Never used to think I did, but for a long time when I would go toy shopping, I seemed to always buy a new butt plug. At least if they had something bigger than I had. I went through the toy boxes the other day and counted 37 butt plugs. 37, for fuck sake. The reason that number surprises me is because it wasn’t obvious due to the fact that I have over 200 dildos in there too! Half of my spare bedroom is devoted to my fuck toys.

This one I’m on is called a Fat Man in a Barrel. Fat doesn’t even begin…go look it up yourself. I love that once I seat it in and my ass lips clamp around the flange it ain’t going anywhere. Fuck, it feels good, my fat man. Where was I? Where am I? Can I get Wanton Sluts for $300, Alex? Gawd, I love lazy days like this…Safeway, Sandy. ….Later… gotta say, this fat man has been like baseball was to Chico Escuela. Getting this hot brings out the silly, but how can I not when this butt plug is so berry, berry good to me.

What this fat man in my ass does bring to mind is crazy shit I’ve done with him. It’s like he’s my boyfriend and we’re doing kinky things to spice things.

I’ve done this twice and it made me so horny and feel so slutty; I went out in public with my fat man stuffed up my ass.

The story-

One thing I think is sooooo slutty is putting in this plug, my fat man, and then put on this ultra hot pair of stretch denim jeans I have and go walk the mall. Seriously, it was as almost as good as two huge cocks up my ass, but in a different way. Because even though I’ve fucked on film for three years, like 200 scenes…I don’t get recognized when I’m out. Might be a surprise to some, but it’s hard not to be anonymous in LA. Besides, I never got any taller, I’m still five feet tall but I managed to fill out. I am totally in love with my butt. In certain jeans, shorts, whatever, I’m fucking hot…the mall, you slut, the mall. Sorry.

So it has to be the stretch jeans, because if they’re just super tight regular denim, They try to push the plug even further up and that’s just too much, and hides to point of the whole exercise…

When I get them stretched up over my butt and settled in place I turn around to look in the mirror and I almost squirted in my pants. O.M.G. It looks like there’s a family sized can of soup trying to bust out of my jeans. Fuck, it’s so hot. It was then and it is now remembering it.

So yeah, these stretch jeans are so nasty looking and they are loooow on my hips, but high enough in back to provide a frame for the plug , a tight t-shirt over my proud and perky B+ tits, I’m fucking hot, I know it sounds arrogant, whatever, but I was psyching myself up for the mall. And I could somehow make myself think I might not attract much attention. Because one thing the mall is full of is freaks wanting to attract attention. So how would a hot little high school girl turn any heads. White Nikes, white t-shirt, and faded blue jeans, nothing to see here. I had put a pad in front because I was gushing before I left the apartment.

I saw that the 405 was moving, so I blasted up and over to that mall in Pacoima, trying to get out of my home range a bit. I was lucky, but it was one in the afternoon. That’s LA for ya though, when the freeway isn’t jammed, it’s fuckin’ flying.

I parked and checked myself in the mirror and laughed. With the sprinkle of freckles that I have finally embraced as fucking sexy (and make me look like straight up jail-bait) the ball cap with my pony tail stuck through the size adjuster thingy, my insanity looked obvious due to the fact my eyes were dilated wider than my asshole right then, like the whites were almost gone. I felt like pure molten sex.

I chose to my fat man for this because I knew I could make the full trip without a sudden gotta-get-it-out-now-now-NOW happening. I’ve worn this plug all day before around the house and slept all night with him in dozens of times. Still, I did a check as I walked to the doors and pushed out some and I could feel him dropping a bit, but the instant I relaxed he slid right back up to where the thick base rested between my cheeks, displaying a complete ring standing about an inch proud of the compound curves of my sexy little butt. Here we go…

I walk like I have a destination for a bit, all boring stores right here anyway. It’s June, so there’s a lot of kids my age, oops, I mean… you know what I mean. I was immersed in this, I felt like I was 16, looked like it 16, 22, whatever. I’ll still be getting carded when I’m 40, bank on it.

I guide toward the Foot Locker, Those boys are usually hunky, good as any…

 

Edited November 24, 2016 by oregongaper
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